Chapter Twenty ~ Now my feet won't touch the ground

AWC's brow furrowed with intense concentrationalism. She had made the decision that morning, at 12:03 AM, to get off of her lazy rear and actually write something.



Narrator: Wait... has it stricken anyone as odd that the Anonymous.Writer.Character hasn't actually written anything within these past nineteen chapters?

Producer: Argh! Stop asking questions! The plot-holes are veiled thinly enough as it is!

Narrator: I was just trying to be inquisitive. That's supposedly the key to happiness. Staying inquisitive.

"There... was a boy..." AWC started to sing, as she typed. "A very strange enchanted boy... they say he wandered very faaaar..."

"AWC!" The suzumebachi buzzed into the zen pagoda through the front door. "Stop singing! It's interfering with my buzzing!"

"I'm sorry," AWC said. "It's just, sitting at a typewriter... I was overcome with song!"

"That's the worst excuse I've ever heard," the suzumebachi said. "And I told you not to watch Moulin Rouge. That movie makes you sob for hours and hours, and forest floods are extremely unpleasant to those of us who can't fly!" She looked across the room where Lemony was sleeping on the couch cushion, with Florence perched watchfully on the armrest. "Like your rabbit."

"I think all movies make me cry." AWC hummed and considered. "Wait... there has to be some movie that doesn't make me cry. Oh yeah. Star Wars."

"No, you cried during Star Wars!"

"Tears of boredom don't count," AWC replied.

There was a knock on the door. Florence leapt into the air in a flurry of feathers, and flew straight at the door. "I'll get it! I'll get it!"

Lemony woke with a start, then dashed at the door as well. "No I'll get it!"

Florence and Lemony stopped at the threshold. They remembered then that the zen pagoda didn't actually have a door, just a spacious opening in an elegantly carved doorframe. Doors themselves aren't very zen. Doorways, on the other hand...

"It's the dragon lady!" The critters exclaimed simultaneously.

Neck curled down awkwardly so that she could see into the little zen pagoda, the dragon lady called out. "AWC, are you there, AWC?"

AWC got up from her typewriter and slowly, determinedly approached the zen doorway. "What are you doing here, Loretta?"

"I just came to tell you we're throwing a party of intense awesomeosity to celebrate our daring escape from the mines!" The dragon lady grinned. "It's going to be a wonderful party, the entire forest is invited. There will be food, there will be beverage, there will be musical chairs and Mr. Blue heron's going to cheat, just like he always does!"


"Oh wonderful!" AWC exclaimed, "I love being shoved off of chairs by egotistical avians!"


"I know," the dragon lady agreed, "It'll be just like old times."


"Let's go on a walk and compose the guest list," AWC said.


The dragon lady and the rabbit girl headed out into the deep dark forest. One by one, they encountered all of their heavenly forest friends, who agreed to attend the festivities, including the highly respected, greatly beloved pirate queen. Unfortunately, Shadow the angry wolf had to pupsit on that day, the tome of superiority was in hiding, Forget-me-not was in Alligator City, and Jack the thief was busy with a mission stealing some sort of gem from some mysterious cavern in some location in the middle of elsewhere.

"I think that's everyone," AWC said, checking off the box next to Moe's name. The two were on the sandy path that lead to the zen pagoda, their mission nearly completed. "Wait, stop!"

The dragon lady looked around the path. "Why? What?"

AWC beckoned Loretta to follow, and went off the path across the grass, to a little sandy place by the ever flowing zen river. "We must pay our respects," AWC said, kneeling in the grass.

"To... oh..." Loretta realized. There was a marble slab on a tiny grave, with the name Sally scribbled across in pink sharpie.

"WHY, Sally, WHY?" AWC said, sobbing, rolling over off her knees and lying flat facedown in the grass. "You were so young, so beautiful. Oh, Sally... you were the best muse I've ever had. I first listened to Interpol on you, and together we discovered the wonders of Coheed and Cambria..."

"Coheed and Cambria?" Loretta made a face. "Seriously?"

"Is there no world for tomorrow, if we wait for today?" AWC sang softly.

"There is... something wrong with you." Loretta shook her dragony head disappointedly.

"Excuse me, crying lady and scary dragon?" a small raccoon peered out from behind the tombstone.

"YOU!" AWC growled. "This grave belongs to Sally! My beautiful muse!"

"I'm sorry," the raccoon looked very scared. It could have been because of AWC's harsh tone, or it could have been because there was a large dragon with fangs and claws peering curiously down at it. Whatever reason, the raccoon began trembling. "It's just... I'm lost!"

"Awww, poor little raccoon..." the dragon cooed maternally. "What's your name, small one?"

"Nancy," the raccoon sniffed. "I lost my kid!"

"Come on, Loretta, it's obviously lying. Do you seriously believe there's a random raccoon kid running around this vast forest that we don't know about?" AWC folded her arms. She felt a little foolish for scolding the poor raccoon, and so she was pouting.

"This isn't my forest... my forest is darker, and all the animals are different, and there's not a giraffe, and the cabin we live in is there!" the raccoon said. "I'm not lying, honest. It's a little peaceful cabin, in the middle of the Painter's Forest!"

"A small home in the middle of a big forest." AWC frowned. "Sounds really, really familiar. Should we trust it?"

"I don't know," Loretta said. "How did you get here?"

"I chased a white stag..." the raccoon shrugged. "It was pretty... I thought Jimmy could paint it!"

"Who's Jimmy?" AWC asked.

"My kid!" The raccoon was getting more and more anxious.

"What's up?" Narcissa appeared spontaneously between Loretta and AWC. "I could sense the gathering of like minds and I just had to stop by. How are my darling friends?" She was grinning slyly, so Loretta and AWC were reluctant to discuss current events with her, uncertain if this was Narcissa or Narcissa's shadow. "Oh my glider!" Narcissa gasped. "Nancy, what are you doing here?"

"Narccy!" the raccoon jumbed up into Narcissa's arms. "I'm so glad you're here! I'm lost, and there's this dragon, and this girl who looks like kind of like Jimmy only she's alot, alot, alot, alot alot more grumpy..."

"I'm not grumpy..." AWC said. She leaned in to whisper to Loretta. "Loretta, am I grumpy?"

"You were grieving. It's ok. I forgive you," Loretta replied.

"So how do you know... Nancy, was it?" AWC asked.

"Oh, I go between forests. Because I know absolutely everyone." She smiled slyly again. "I've got everybody typed... and then I typed up their types. I can get inside pretty much anyone's head."

"Can you take Nancy home?" AWC asked.

"Not really," Narcissa said. "I think Jimmy has to come get her."

"How will he know what world she's in?" Loretta asked.

"Easy. He's like us. He should be able to sense our gathering just like I could. Then, I'm sure I can open up a portal he can come through. You guys take Nancy to the zen pagoda, while I try that. Poor creature could use some peace."

"I don't know..." AWC said. "Narcissa, the only creature besides my mindpets who ever go in there is Suzumebachi, and she's my sister... I don't even know..."

The raccoon looked up at her with big, sparkly masked eyes.

"Uh..." AWC groaned. "Okay, come on." She held out her arms for creature.

Nancy looked cautiously up at Narcissa, who nodded reassuringly, and the raccoon leapt into AWC's arms. "Alack!" AWC exclaimed. "Heavy! Oof!"

"Hurry back once you drop her off," Narcissa said, "We need to all be here together to get Jimmy to appear."

"She's right," Loretta chuckled. "We need to harness the power of three. I call being Piper."

"Ooh! I'm Pru. She's powerful," Narcissa smiled.

"Ack that makes me Phoebe... AWC groaned again. "Dude..."

"Haha, your powers SUCK!" The dragon lady stuck out her tongue.

"Maybe I won't come back!" AWC exclaimed. Nancy tensed in AWC's arms. "No, no, it's ok, I was just kidding." AWC sighed. "Come on. Oh, and you'd better be nice to Lemony."

To Be Continued...